You may be unsure about using a sex toy for the first time for play by yourself or with your partner (or partners!). Maybe you worry that using a dildo means you are not enough for your partner. Or you are afraid of hurting yourself when you play.
We’re here to guide you through your first time, so to speak. There is nothing embarrassing about wanting to try a dildo, and it doesn’t mean you aren’t happy with your partner. Think of it as an extension of your body. You use your hands and mouth, and a dildo just adds another tool to your sensual arsenal. Without further ado, here are our tips for using a dildo for the first time:
1. Get a sex toy you like.
How are you going to use the dildo? By yourself? With a partner? Are you planning to use it as a strap-on, for vaginal or anal insertion, or for another purpose? For your first time with a sex toy, make sure you get one you’ll love!
If you’re unsure what kind of dildo to get, visit a sex shop near you and look at the available varieties. If you shop online, you can browse comfortably from your home and see what you might like the best.
Dildos come in all shapes and sizes, from realistic to fantasy, so there will be one (or more!) right for you. If you don’t want a realistic-looking dildo to use the first time, there are plenty to choose from, from cute rabbits to smooth oval shapes. Dildos made for anal insertion will have a flared base to prevent them from going all the way into the rectum, but they can be used vaginally, too!
2. Pick a smaller dildo for your first time using one.
We won’t be the ones to tell you you shouldn’t start with something large if you want to, but it goes without saying that smaller and thinner dildos will be easier to insert and play with if it’s your first time using a sex toy. And remember–you don’t have to insert it all the way. Try different angles and depths to see what works best for you.
If you’ve never used a dildo, try one that’s 1.25” in diameter and see how that feels. For anal insertion, try one 1” or less. If you’ve already been penetrated, you can try larger ones and work up from there.
The most important thing is that your dildo should feel good inside of you and should be inserted easily. It’s not about how much you can take; it’s about how much pleasure you get.
3. Relax.
Get yourself in the mood. If you’re playing with a new toy, it’s a good idea to try it by yourself the first time.
You can get used to how it feels against your skin, in your mouth, or wherever you want to put it. Touch it, squeeze it - kick the tires and see if you like it.
Using a dildo for the first time should be fun. It’s great to laugh, give it a hand job, or try putting a condom on it and see how it goes.
The advantage of playing by yourself first is that you can go as slow or as fast as you want. If you try to insert your dildo and it doesn’t feel right, that’s OK. You can relax and try again without any pressure.
If you want to play with a partner later, you’ll know all about your dildo, how it feels inside you, and the best way to give yourself pleasure.
If you are going to try vaginal and anal penetration with a dildo, either use a condom, wash well with sex toy cleaner, or get two dildos. Never use the same dildo to go between anal and vaginal penetration without a condom; you don’t want bacteria spreading where it isn’t welcome. Especially if you are a person with a vagina; this can make yeast infections more likely.
4. There’s no such thing as too much lube.
Really. If it takes the whole bottle for you to be comfortable, then great! If you’re using a dildo the first time, you might tense up, even though you’re trying your best to relax. Use as much lube as you need for easy insertion, especially if your sex toy is for anal play.
Pro tip: It’s best to avoid silicone-based lubricants with silicone toys because they can degrade your dildo. Choose a water- or oil-based lube instead. If you do decide to use a silicone-based lube, be sure to wash it thoroughly immediately after use to minimize the risk of damage to your toy.
5. Have fun! You’re using a dildo! Go, you!
It is 100% acceptable to have a fun, funny, laugh-out-loud experience the first time using your dildo or any sex toy. Don’t worry about having or giving an orgasm; just do what feels good to you and/or your partner. Just like sex with other body parts, things happen.
If your dildo shoots out and flies across the room, have a good laugh with your partner or yourself, go clean it off (no cat hair on the dildo, please), and play some more. Sex toys are made to enhance your sexual experience. Use them any way you please. Try one with a vibrator. Or with your mouth and hands together. The combinations are practically endless.
So go forth, get a dildo, and have a great time!
At Kreature Adult Toys, we're serious about sex, and we're serious about safety. If you want your first time using a dildo to be out of this world, shop our body and skin-safe fantasy dildos.